Bullsh*t: I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word!

Um could you stop stealing my

Sunday edition?

Goodsh*t: I can feel the Christmas noose beginning to tighten

I always get misty-eyed when Ralphie gets his Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle! I generally don't buy gifts for family anymore unless you're a minor, money best saved for visits! However I still like to peruse, what do you want for Christmas? Here's my list:

1. A GOOD Year

2. Berlin

3. Peace & Quiet

4. Don't Need It, Just Want It.
Photo courtesy of muxu

5. No Worries for All!
(I realize this is a tall order, a girl can wish!)

Goodsh*t: Thankful

Life gives me lemons sometimes so I allow myself to react (not such a good idea to bottle yourself up) then I regroup and count my blessings. Even if it feels dire at the moment, I always revert back to this little exercise and remind myself that life is generally pretty good. Plus, the sound of my own voice complaining is DEAFENING. Give thanks people!

1. The cheeseball I had as my main course for thanksgiving dinner.
2. Holiday visitors!
3. My health.
4. A disaster zone at the moment (think remnants of Mt. Vesuvius), pretty thankful my ceiling didn't hit anyone on the head.
5. Relationships, I got some great people around me who give a shit and even put up with my shit.
6. Change. Without it, life would be BORING.
7. Looking at buying a car to drive to the cabin in the Catskills I don't even own. YET.
8. The ability to slow my brain down. (I have an active exaggerated mind sometimes)
9. Butter and cream cheese.
10. What you see is what you get.

Goodsh*t: What's the Difference Between Chicken and Turkey?

Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!

I hope you all eat your faces off!

Goodsh*t: Snowfuckingwhite!

Bullsh*t: The Sky IS Falling...

and I got the pictures to prove it! Life was just lifey this past week and to end it all I walk in my front door at precisely 10PM and WHOOSH! The ceiling in the 2nd bedroom collapsed. It was like out of a movie or some shit, thank goodness no one's head was on the receiving end! And for metaphor's fucking sake, I seriously hope the dust is settling.

Goodsh*t: My Mother and I Agree...

I can't take credit for this, I ripped it off from ingenius designer Kyle Poff.

Ahhh, but the message is so nice, I couldn't help myself.

PS His portfolio is AMAZING. This isn't even the half of it!

Holy Sh*t!: Miniature Pepperonis!

What a wonderful thing to come home to in the mailbox!
Imagine the pizza bagel possibilities!
Thank you Le Jeff!

*For the record, the pepperonis I received are certainly NOT turkey or low in fat!
(just couldn't find a better picture!)

Goodsh*t: Thom Browne for the Ladies with the Champagnes

Photos courtesy of Jak & Jil

Thom Browne is one of my favorite designers EVER. With his Moncler Gamme Bleu collaboration sealing the deal. Pardon me while I camp out at Barney's until SS 2011.

How can I not love a man who rolls in formal shorts? Thank you Thom Browne, thank you.

Bullsh*t: The OVER-Stimulus Package

Now I know why I took a hiatus from all this glory: NOTHING NEW TO REPORT. The internets know what you're going to do before you even do it. Stalker. Everything has already been posted, plugged, plucked, purported! This is why I shut off Facebook, decreased my activity on certain sites and have been trying to read more books and enjoy some physical fitness and some letter writing and some phone calling.

I NEED SOME NEW SHIT.
(Give me a minute)

In the meantime, enjoy some old shit:

Cheeseball!

Before Erasure! Old.

Scissors. Old.

Kimchi. Old.

I was gunna post the oldest profession in the world, but my mom reads this.
Instead, Jerry Blank. Old.

Actually, according to the webz, ARCHITECTURE is the world's oldest profession.

Flatiron. Old.

Beer. Old.

The first Women's size 7. Real old.



Lanvin. Le old.